Worst mornings...

2-April-2014
Wednesday
6:31 A.M.

Love: Feels like heaven, hurts like hell.

Good morning.. I have got no reason to call any morning good. It was awesome when I used to open my eyes reading your text. I extremely miss the cute texts, love, romance & everlasting promises.

As the time is passing I m getting worse to worst. Last night Ankit told me not to be like this & spoil myself. I could only listen to him because I had no reply what to say. Am I doing it willingly?  No. Loving you is like breathing, I don't do it, it just happens.

The days when I was with you were so smooth. I didn't care what problems I have because in every situation you could make me smile. A simple 'hugs u', 'luv u my baby' 'u r my buddhu baby' like words always made me smile. I was..I am addicted to all this. Now I feel emptiness and the worst part is noone can fill this emptiness. No one can ever take the place you made in my heart.

My love story was more than a fairy tale. Do fairy tales end like this? I'm sure no. So should I consider it hasn't ended yet? Maybe these are some stupid notions of mine.

22:13 P.M.

Don't know what to say. Missing you a lot. Want to cry..already teary eyes. Why is this happening with me? I really want to restart my life. I want to forget everything. I want to move on. How can I be so helpless? I was never like this. I have faced many tough times before but losing you is toughest phase of my life. I am just not getting what to do. It seems so stupid of me.. why the hell I am crying for someone who doesn't even exist now? I have no answer. Everyday I promise myself I won't think about you or cry and everyday I break my own promise.

I want this pain to subside and live like a free bird as before. But I think this pain will subside only with my last breath.