27-April -2014
Sunday
6:25 A.M
So what do you call it when all you feel is pain, when the place you call home feels deserted, when you look back at your own past and regret for every choice you made, when those who always appreciated you look at you with sympathy, when every time you smile or laugh it takes a great toll over your heart, when you try to look normal but your gestures say another story, when all you want is to cry, when nothing in the world makes you feel happy and you want to elope? That's how I am feeling right now. I am feeling loneliness enveloping me in its grip tighter and tighter. Pain, loneliness, memories that is what left with me. I am losing somewhere in never ending darkness. Unseen, unheard, dejected, broken, ripped into pieces. Do you know how it feels? I am scared of this darkness. I don't want to get lost in this dark zone. Someone please find me. Hold my hand and help me to come out of it. It's scary.
Do you know how it feels to left behind? Do you know the pain of losing everyone around? I know it. I am bearing it. It's so unbearable. It's killing me inside. I am paying for the mistake I never did.
Once again my hopes are getting life as I can see you online. I kept my cellphone switched off ever since I saw you online because I can't resist for a long time. My heart won't listen to me and I'll text you. But one thing has certainly changed. I am feeling a bit better now. It turns me head over heals when it comes to you. Just seeing you online can make me feel better. If you'll be with me I know my all smiles will also come back.
At least I am not crying today. As I opened my eyes the first thing I have checked is if you are online /away or not. Your id status is showing away. Maybe you're sleeping. I know its going to be my new addiction to check you are there or not.
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