How to face...

May 15th, 2014
Thursday
20:51 P.M.

The urge of this heart that I want you, just you and only you will kill me someday...

All I want is you and nothing else. I didn't know life would be so difficult to live without you. Today after gathering all my courage I activated my FB once again. Can you believe it I deactivated it within 10 minutes? Do you know why? The cover pic was my name you wrote on your hand which reminds me of you. The statutes show the number of comments which were yours. The posts I updated on special occasions to wish you remind me how much you loved me. The love announcement update which has our story and pic of K..... damn I can't even his name. It hurts so much.

Tomorrow Iti is coming to Kanpur with her family along with Aarav. Very soon I have to face her. I can handle Aarav but Iti... how will I face her? I am not sure if I am thankful to her for what she did or I am angry with her  for bursting the bubble of my happiness. Even after viewing the profile of K... I trusted you, I wanted to be with you. I wish I had never shared all that with her. I know she was concerned about me but the step took to make everything right was wrong.

I have to face Aarav as well. He was always against our relationship. He warned me so many times not because he was jealous, actually he was worried. The way our relationship was progressing from one step to other so quickly was making him uncomfortable. His intuition was right. Everything ended so abruptly as he had predicted. I know he won't raise this topic as he knows how painful it is for me to remind the past and answer his questions. Still I am feeling so uneasy. Meeting everyone, pretending that I am moved on, unfazed, nonplussed with whatever happened is going to be treacherous for me. Faking smiles and showing I am happy isn't easy for me.

The biggest problem is I can't escape from this situation. In fact I can't even tell anyone what I am feeling at this moment. In few hours they will arrive to Kanpur. Aarav is so desperate to see me. I am sure he'll come to meet me tomorrow itself. I can't even avoid him this time. I'm afraid I'll give up as he will come in front of me.